Eleven years ago today, I had four children under age 7 and was pregnant with the fifth. I was absolutely exhausted.
Nine years ago today, I was thinking about the possibility of gardening. I did plant a few things that year but paid everything very little attention, and nothing really survived.
Eight years ago today, I had a membership to the YMCA and chose to play a little basketball, a sport I hadn’t played in years and which my body absolutely rejected.
Six years ago today, I was potty training my youngest child. I had finally learned the secret of rewarding both the child AND the parent for all that hard work. My kids were watching PBS Kids.
Five years ago today, I was reminding other parents that they – not their doctor, their friends, or anyone else – are in charge of what goes on and in their children’s bodies, something I frequently reminded mamas of over the years, after wishing I had understood that better myself in my early parenting years.
Four years ago today, our friend Jacob was dying and I was asking my many prayer warrior friends to ask the Lord to save his life. I also had just discovered the incredible power of Mindwise to help one of my dyslexic children finally have the ability to have things “click” in her reading and comprehension.
Three years ago today, my dad was lying in the hospital with a dangerous blood infection. We did not know how things would end, but a few days later he moved to another facility and several days after that, he moved home.
Two years ago today, I was watching our new tiny chicks, and I was at my sewing machine making dozens of masks a day – something I now recognize as silly but which filled my desire to be a helper at that time. I choose not to be ashamed of that decision. I did the best I could with the information I had, and that’s all we can really ask of people.
One year ago today, I was in the process of learning to be still. To not need to share everything with the world. To process my thoughts in a new way. So one year ago today, I have no idea what I was doing…and that’s okay.
Today, I watched two hours of Mister Rogers with my kids because we were all too exhausted to do “regular school.” We virtually toured an eraser factory, watched a renowned pianist play a few songs, visited a chef in his kitchen making whipped cream, and learned about how mistakes are a crucial part of learning.
I watched my 8 and 10 year olds plant potatoes in the soil, instructed my 14 year old on how to prepare dinner in the crockpot, moved around trays of plants that will feed our family all summer long, and gathered eggs from my backyard.
My life is extremely full right now. Most of our days are packed with an abundance of truly necessary activities like teaching kids to read, driving kids to work, teaching kids to drive themselves to work, preparing meals, connecting with neighbors, and generally caring for a lot of other human beings. It’s just the nature of having so many kids, at such a wide range of ages.
And while I am extremely grateful for all the memories I’ve shared here over the years, I am also grateful that God taught me how to close my mouth (stop my fingers) and just be.
I don’t need affirmations from the world. I only need affirmation from Jesus.
I appreciate you all being here. I am so thankful we have the internet to connect with each other.
I’m just keeping more of my thoughts to myself and saving them for those I’m talking with in person.
Thanks for sticking around.
And hey, let’s grab coffee sometime if you want to connect. ☺️