I’ve been thinking a lot about bitterness lately.
About how it forms, how it manifests, and how it can eat us alive if we let it.
Bitterness is, for me, a sin that I don’t like to think about.
It’s something I feel worthy of holding onto.
Because I’ve been wronged.
Obviously the other person is the one who is sinning. Not me.
But bitterness is a sin that can slowly destroy us if we allow it even the tiniest bit of an entrance into our lives.
It enters so casually.
One word.
One look.
One misunderstanding.
And then before we know it, it grows.
We hear another thing, see another thing, or misunderstand another thing. We allow ourselves to mull over those things. Over and over again, we think on them and we keep that bitterness burner in our hearts on the simmer setting.
The longer we let that bitterness simmer, the more it grows into something we never even imagined it could.
The saddest thing about bitterness, perhaps, is that oftentimes it is based entirely on a misunderstanding. Because instead of addressing the situation immediately with whomever we feel has offended us, we keep it to ourselves.
The next part, I think, is the scariest part of all. Because what happens next is that our mind allows us to see only the negative parts of that person’s life or communication with us.
The human brain is phenomenally capable of far more than we understand. And it has the ability to filter for us exactly what we want to see, rather than what is, in fact, reality.
If we dig in our heels and cling to bitterness, something I can be so prone to doing, we can actually choose to completely cut ourselves off from accepting any joy or any encouragement from the person toward whom our bitterness has grown, no matter how much they aim to bring us good.
We can refuse to accept any blessing the Lord may be trying to give us through them, because of our own insistence on remaining bitter.
Friends, I am ashamed to say that I have so much personal experience with this. If I could encourage you in one thing today, it would be that you would cast aside any bitterness you have allowed to grow in your heart, and instead, run to Jesus with your pain. Let HIM heal your heart.
Because here’s the reality…
We must be intentional about ridding our minds of bitterness, asking forgiveness as necessary, and choosing to see the good in our lives. (1 Corinthians 13:5)
We must actively seek out what we know to be true, what we know to be right. (Philippians 4:8)
We must look for the good in people and assume the best of them. Because if we don’t, we are setting both them AND ourselves up for failure in so many ways. (1 Corinthians 13:7)
I looked up synonyms for “bitterness” and I found this one:
A DEEP-SEATED ILL WILL
Wow. When worded that way, bitterness sounds quite a bit less like a right I have to hold, and quite a bit more like a sin I’m guilty of.
The Bible talks about bitterness this way:
“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” (Ephesians 4:31-32)
Please, let me encourage you today, as the Lord is encouraging my own heart…
Run to Jesus.
Give him your bitterness and your pain.
He is there, and He is ready and willing to carry you.